I decided to come home early so that I could respond to your e-mail.... I will start with asking a question - have you taken the MBTI previously and were you actually classified by a professional as INFP?
Many of the online tests are not that accurate. If the answer is NO, I would suggest that you take the online test at www.advisorteam.com, which is a good starting point. There is a charge for this test.
The www.humanmetrics.com website has a free test that is fairly accurate.
I would also like to give you a word or two of warning about the MBTI. No classification is better than any other classification. All have weaknesses and strengths. The MBTI is simply a great tool for identifying these areas.
Within each letter is a range of values. For example, I am an INFJ with a very strong I & N but a very weak F & J preferences. That would mean that I have different strengths (and weaknesses) than another INFJ that has strong F & J preferences. Under stress, I tend to become more of an INTP.
Another important consideration is the importance of the dominant, auxiliary, tertiary and inferior functions. It is also important that you understand that these functions are each extroverted or introverted. Please visit this website for an excellent explanation of this: http://www.geocities.com/lifexplore/index.html.
If you are an INFP (I believe that you are), your dominant function is Introverted Feeling, which means that you primarily live in the inner world of (introverted) feelings - your values system is based on emotions and feelings rather than hard logic.
You get all your information for these feelings based on extroverted intuition. This means that you scan the outside world subconsciously and gather information to form your values, which rule your life, often without logic behind these feelings. Because the feeling function is introverted, you likely have a difficult time expressing your feelings. Consequently, others have a hard time understanding or relating to not only your feelings but also to your actions and conclusions.
The bright side is that you are probably very gentle, caring and trustworthy person because of this. You can't sacrifice your values because they are who you really are. People like you (1% of the population) tend to be excellent writers because they can step back from the outer world and express their thoughts on paper.
On the contrary side of this, I am INFJ, which means that my dominant function is Introverted Intuition. My auxiliary function is Extroverted Feeling. For the lack of a better word, I tend to be very KNOWING right off the bat. For example, I can tell if I would enjoy a certain activity before I actually do it or I can see patterns in behavior readily. I am a residential builder and this helps me on the job, as I rarely need details and can figure things out quickly. My auxiliary function is Extroverted Feeling, which means that I have little trouble expressing what I am feeling. I tend to be rather outgoing for an introvert because of this. For example, I always remember everyone's birthday, I never forget to say thank you, etc...
I had to chuckle when you said that you miss details. So does almost every NF or NT type out there. As an INFJ, my inferior function is Sensing, so I am probably worse than you. NF/NT types see the world differently than SF and SP types that are very visual and notice every little thing that is out of place.
What you do notice though is how people feel and how things that you do impact others. This is far more important than remembering what color of shirt someone was wearing.
Here is where things get a little tough for INFP's. Your inferior function is Extroverted Thinking. This means that is a stretch for you to come up with logical conclusions or explanations for the feelings and values that you have. This is not the same thing as saying you are not intelligent. In fact, INFP/INFJ types tend to far more intelligent that other types. It is just that hard logic doesn't fit into the equation very well.
The trouble you are having is not uncommon for NF types. You are trying to improve your intuition so that you fit into a world filled with ST and SF types. DO NOT DO THIS!
Please learn to accept the fact that you are blessed with a far deeper understanding of what is important in life than those around you. Developing intuition is not about learning to make it fit into some mold that is the "norm." It is the norm that makes people do stupid things the same way over and over again just because that is the way that they were done before.
What you can do to improve yourself, as we all should do constantly, is improve your weaker functions - such as forgetfulness (my curse). Make lists, get a planner, etc. Take an accounting class. If you are a P type, make an effort to be more conscious of time and deadlines. Try to be a bit more organized. These are all steps in the right direction.
On a more personal note, I want to point out (this only my opinion) that life is difficult for everyone whether they notice it or not. ES types tend to catch the little details but miss the big picture. Most T types tend to be a little cold and lose touch with their feelings. NF types are really lucky because they can always get in touch with their feelings - hell, they can't avoid them. They never lose sight of the big picture and they understand the consequences of their actions of others. Few people are capable of this. Remember, 99% of the world can't do this. You are blessed. You have my E-mail and I would be more than happy, I would be honored and grateful for the opportunity to help you in any way that I can. Please do not hesitate to contact me.
David DeVaughn
INFJ - and proud of it
David DeVaughn is an INFJ that got tired of fighting the corporate world and is now an entrepreneur living in Traverse City, Michigan.
If you would like to respond to this article, or have a question for David, please contact David @ davidmdevaughn@aol.com
David de Vaughn with Buddy
